My 90-year-old grandma has always been strong-willed, and honestly, that’s something I’ve always admired about her. She helped raise my mom and cared for our family when we were younger, so for years I happily handled her grocery shopping as a way of giving back.
Every week, no matter the weather, I’d pick up everything she needed and bring it straight to her door.
At first, it was simple.
But slowly, things began to change.
Her shopping lists became more expensive — imported fruit, premium brands, pastries from a bakery across town. Then the calls started coming during my workday, demanding I stop everything and bring her items “immediately.”
If I couldn’t come fast enough, she’d guilt-trip me by reminding me of everything she had done for the family over the years. And because I love her so much, I kept saying yes, even when it was draining my time, energy, and money.
Eventually, I realized the issue wasn’t helping her — I wanted to help her.
The problem was that helping had slowly turned into an expectation, and my kindness had become something she assumed would always be available no matter the cost to me.
Loving someone deeply doesn’t mean you can never set boundaries.
