We bought a house with a pool in a quiet neighborhood, and almost immediately our neighbors started sending their young son over alone. No warning, no asking — he’d just appear. The problem? He was terrified of water and clearly didn’t know how to swim.
I asked his mom if she could supervise him or help teach him. She laughed and said, “He’ll learn naturally.”
So every time he came over, I felt forced to watch him. I never agreed to babysit, but I couldn’t ignore a nervous child standing near a pool. I basically became his unpaid lifeguard.
One day I heard a splash and ran outside in panic, only to find a doll floating in the pool. The boy calmly told me he wanted to see if it would sink. Then he added, “She said things go away if they go under.”
That moment really unsettled me.
After that, I realized his visits weren’t random anymore. It became expected that I’d supervise him. Then his mom casually suggested I should teach him to ride a bike too because I was “so good with him.”
That’s when it hit me — I somehow became responsible for her son’s milestones without ever agreeing to it. Now I’m wondering if setting boundaries makes me the bad guy.
