An eighty-year-old woman sat in a quiet medical clinic, bothered by a constant itch that had become impossible to ignore. Proud of her traditional values, she had lived her entire life with her virtue intact and carried that fact with confidence.
When she met the first doctor, he listened briefly before scribbling on his pad.
“Ma’am, sounds like you’ve got the crabs,” he said casually.
Her eyes widened in outrage.
“Doctor, that is impossible! I am an eighty-year-old virgin and have never been with a man in my life. You need to reconsider that diagnosis!”
Refusing to accept such an answer, she went to another doctor. After hearing her symptoms, he nodded and told her the same thing.
Again, she stood up angrily.
“I told the last doctor, and I’ll tell you too—I am an eighty-year-old virgin. There is no possible way I have crabs!”
Still determined, she visited a third doctor known for being extremely thorough.
Before he could speak, she warned him,
“Two other doctors tried telling me I have crabs. I am an eighty-year-old virgin, and I know that’s impossible!”
After carefully examining her, the doctor smiled.
“Well ma’am, you were absolutely right. It’s not crabs at all.”
Relieved, she asked,
“Then what is it?”
The doctor leaned closer and whispered:
“Your cherry is so old… you’ve got fruit flies.”
