Raising children while caring for aging parents is pushing many families to the brink. Between work, school, and medical emergencies, the emotional and financial strain—often carried without support—is leading more people to speak out about burnout and boundaries.
One reader, Nancy, shared why she refused to care for her mother without compensation.
Nancy is a 35-year-old single mother raising three children—ages 7, 3, and 6 months. Her 74-year-old mother lived with her rent-free and helped with childcare until a serious fall left her unable to remain active. Wanting to avoid a nursing home, Nancy offered to continue caring for her mother at home—but only if she received financial help.
Her mother’s response was harsh: “I’m your mom—you owe me.”
That same night, Nancy’s mother took matters into her own hands. She arranged placement in a nursing home and had a moving truck remove everything she owned from the house—including furniture and even the baby’s crib, which had been a gift.
When confronted, her mother accused Nancy of being ungrateful and abandoning her.
Nancy insists she isn’t a nurse—she’s an overwhelmed single parent. She says love alone can’t cover the physical, emotional, and financial cost of full-time caregiving.
Her story raises a difficult but increasingly common question: when love and duty collide, where is the line between family support and personal sacrifice?
