1. The Vaseline Mix-Up
Fred and Mary couldn’t afford a honeymoon, so they spent their first night as a married couple at Fred’s parents’ house.
The next morning, Fred’s little brother Johnny asked his mom,
“Are Fred and Mary up yet?”
“No,” she replied.
Johnny said, “I think they—”
“I don’t want to hear what you think. Go to school.”
At lunch, Johnny asked again.
“No.”
“I think they—”
“Eat your lunch and go back to school.”
After school, Johnny tried one more time.
“Mom, can I tell you what I think?”
She sighed. “Fine.”
Johnny said, “Last night Fred came to my room asking for Vaseline… and I think I gave him my airplane glue.”
2. The Missing Fish
A newlywed couple went swimming at their hotel. The bride wore a new bikini that kept slipping off, and they laughed as they retrieved it from the bottom of the pool.
That evening at dinner, they noticed a huge aquarium beside their table — completely empty.
The bride asked the waiter, “Why are there no fish in the aquarium?”
The waiter smiled.
“That’s not an aquarium… that’s the swimming pool.”
3. The Mystery Tickets
After their honeymoon, a couple received two tickets to a popular show. Inside the envelope was only a note:
“Guess who sent them?”
They couldn’t figure it out, but went anyway and had a wonderful night.
When they returned home, their house had been completely emptied. On the dining table sat another note:
“Now you know.” 😄
